Words in Hand

We came round the side of the French coast and we sailed on. It was getting dark and it was around eight o'clock and we were going deeper into the trough and up, and the boat would sit on the wave and then go in deeper, more and more, and then out again. And I looked through binoculars and the waves were getting higher and higher and we went down and I looked up, and I was holding onto the steering wheel; I'd lost control. And the boat was just going up through the wave, and water came all over us and knocked my head back, pushed me back. I tried to control it, but I was thinking of the people inside the cabin, it was worse for them than for the helmsman, wasn't bad for him, might break their neck, that's all, but what about them? They were rolling all over the place in the cabin. We'd lost control and the boat was just cutting through the water. I saw rocks on my left. I couldn’t navigate. We had to carry on. The waves were just pushing us through and it was getting darker and the clouds were rushing across. There was rain and wind. It was really strong, we went on and on.

We went on and on, the boat just kept going up. We hit on the top of the wave, we were just going too fast, there was no control and we juddered down into the trough, that felt great, I wanted some more! But the boat was actually cutting into the wave and water would pour all over the deck. And the next wave would be bigger and we thought that would be the last one, but no, it just carried on from nine, ten, eleven o'clock, just carried on; holding on at the helm. And the boat would go on through, the waves were getting bigger and I'd look up, we were right in the middle, it was beautiful in the middle, there was no wind it was above the waves. So we were just trying to cut through the troughs and water would pour all over the deck and it was like floating.

Anyway, I banged on the deck for a deaf person to come out and help me, but it was too late, the water just poured into the cabin and they rolled all over the place. And they looked out, and I asked, and the deaf people were panicking, and they were holding on desperately that we couldn't sign and communicate. I wanted the boat to go one way and the boat was being pushed the other, and I told the deaf man to lash the sail! 'No!' he refused and others refused. So I told the deaf man to come and take over from me. 'Come on!' and he had to crawl out just a short distance, and he was pulling himself out and I was trying to pull him towards me. I couldn't pull him just easily, and the boat was going up and I had no harness on, I'd opened it for him to take over from me. So I was pulling myself, and the boat was just cutting at different angles and the water was pouring all over the deck, and the deaf man was shouting. Anyway, I said 'You take over yourself and learn yourself!'

And I went down into the cabin. 'What in hell?!' What could I do? There was water pouring all over the floor. I said 'Why is it? Why has it happened?' And a hearing man came towards me, his hair was standing on end, literally standing on end. I pushed him back. 'Don't come this way, because when the boat's going up you'll knock me out through the cabin! No! You'll knock me out!' So I held on and he was coming towards me and I was pushing him back and then the boat would go down and he stumbled back and hit his head, but he hit his head on soft seats and just lay there; his face, their eyes were staring.

I couldn't carry on. Anyway I was patient and determined and I wanted to navigate; pencil and compass were under the water somewhere I couldn't find them, I wanted the compass for navigating, to find out roughly where we were and I came out again and the wind was strong and we couldn't breathe.